Cocktail Hacker Guilty Pleasure: The Squeeze Lime

Mixology Monday XXXII is being hosted by Stevi of Two at the Most.  The topic of the month is Guilty Pleasures and although I have quite a number the only cocktail related one that comes to mind is my love of the squeeze lime.  I’m sure you all know the delicious faux-fruit of which I speak.  Now being a nose in the air cocktail purist most of the time I have to admit, there is something comforting about mixing up a quick Gin and Tonic, squeezing in a bit of “lime” juice and enjoying.  Very little thought is required and nearly no preparation.  It makes for a great drink on a hot day after a long day at work.  Sure, it’s not the purist move, but I’m ok with that.  I don’t drink cocktails to be a purist, I drink them to enjoy.  And that I do.

So, without further ado I present to you my ode to the squeeze lime.

Squeeze Lime

A long, hot day comes to an end
A drink must be prepared
So tired, so lazy
The gin calls to me
The tonic sings its siren song
Gin and Tonic. Of course!
But what of the lime?
The pantry lacking, the store too far
Then an idea, like a green light in my brain
The Squeeze Lime
Green like a fruit of dreams
Textured plastic hints at the citrusy contents within
Top flips open to reveal the nozzle
Invert the vessel and squeeze
Cocktail contentment ensues
Sit back, sip and enjoy
Thank you, Squeeze Lime
Thank you






24 responses to “Cocktail Hacker Guilty Pleasure: The Squeeze Lime”

  1. […] of Cocktail Hacker joins us from Boulder, Colorado. He chooses to celebrate his love of the squeeze lime. Yes, we know we’re supposed to use fresh squeezed every time. But what happens when you just […]

  2. Doug Winship Avatar

    As one who has received much grief for my use of the bottled lime, I add this haiku:
    Green bottle so fair.
    Convenience is what I love.
    Get over it snob.

  3. cocktailnerd Avatar

    For lack of good taste,
    Acid mouthwash partake of.
    Deny beauty, truth

  4. Doug Winship Avatar

    Beautiful limes sit,
    Adorning my bar so well.
    Then they frickin’ rot!

  5. cocktailnerd Avatar

    Lack of management,
    Disgraceful stock rotation,
    Buy less or drink more

  6. Doug Winship Avatar

    Management is work,
    So I try to avoid it
    At all costs, ya see?

  7. cocktailnerd Avatar

    Laziness, no excuse
    Quality cocktail an art
    Non-believer, go.

  8. Reese Avatar

    That which unites us
    Squeeze lime or no, is the drink
    Always delicious

  9. Doug Winship Avatar

    Now you are in for it!
    No one expects the Spanish…
    Inquisition! Ha!

  10. cocktailnerd Avatar

    One bothers to blog
    another wonders why, if
    acrid swill is used.

  11. cocktailnerd Avatar

    Non-sequitur farce
    will get you nowhere, sir, it’s
    only a flesh-wound.

  12. Doug Winship Avatar

    The comfy pillows
    Are filled with lovely green limes,
    Packaged into bottles.

  13. cocktailnerd Avatar

    Not an argument,
    but you say it is, RealLime
    you know is “the suck”

  14. […] Don’t forget, you are one of the fourteen…. All I have to say to you can be found in the comments of this post on CocktailHacker! […]

  15. Reese Avatar

    True gentleman fight…
    Over what you may ponder?
    Juice source of course!

  16. Doug Winship Avatar

    Reese tries to pour oil
    On troubled waters. But Gabe
    Gripes that it’s bottled.

  17. cocktailnerd Avatar

    Store and Pours will serve
    your lazy and slattern ways
    yet you resist, why?

  18. Doug Winship Avatar

    Fresh juice’s appeal
    Owes much to flair. Where is it
    In a plastic jug?

  19. cocktailnerd Avatar

    No! fresh juice’s charm
    lay in its bright purity,
    and not in your eye.

  20. Doug Winship Avatar

    Sorry Gabe, wrong you are.
    The Toast that we all say, speaks
    Not of juice, but mud.

  21. […] you’ve been reading CH for a while now you already know about my love of the squeeze lime, which I waxed poetic about for MxMo XXXII.  However, not everyone agrees with my use of bottled […]

  22. Chris Avatar

    Tanqueray Rangpur,
    fragrant gin with rangpur limes
    solves my fresh lime woes

  23. […] love a good Gin and Tonic.  Heck, I even love a not so good one.  Everything from a dirt cheap bargain G&T to a top shelf libation.  But, out of all the […]

  24. mickbuely Avatar

    hello to every one – hope yous had a great time – back from parents 12lbs heavier a`hhh just back from tenerefe weather crap , all the best for new year – michael